Querying…Again: An animated adventure for all.


March 30, 2012 by Renee

So, I have begun the wonderful and joyous process that is querying again. I’ve sent Jack to one agent. I’m taking it slow, okay? Dirty Truths came back with a final rejection, so I have to think about that one too. If I go too crazy, then I risk getting multiple rejections in a single day and we don’t want that to happen.

Why not? Well, to amuse you all, I’ve provided visuals to show you the query process for me.

So, I begin with writing the query. After hours of self-loathing and rewriting, I come up with something I’m sort of happy with. This is me, after the final version of my query.


I’m sort of happy, but tired. See the bags under my eyes?

Okay, so after searching carefully, I try to find an agent that seems to fit the book I’m querying. This takes a few days usually because I get distracted far too easily. But then, I find one that’s perfect. And I’m happy.

Most agents take about six weeks to give you any reply, and we all know how I am about waiting.


I try to distract myself, but every single morning, I open my email hoping that I’ll see that reply. See, back to happy.

Most of the time, there’s nothing more than rewrite requests for my paid articles and spam.

Then, (cue the angels singing) I see the reply. Oh, do I dare read it? I wait until I’ve had my coffee and I’m reasonably good natured.


It always ends this way. If I have too many of these in a short span of time, well this girl comes out to play.

So you see, this is why I think it’s best to query one, maybe two agents at a time. Keeps me out of prison, and keeps the rest of the world alive and kicking.

Wish me luck!

8 thoughts on “Querying…Again: An animated adventure for all.

  1. Mike Keyton says:

    Good luck, Sweeney

  2. Renee Miller says:

    Haha. Thanks, Mike. Wonder what my self portraits say about me. Hmm.

  3. Vero says:

    Good luck and godspeed and some sense to those fucknuts who keep rejecting your stuff. I hope their ding-dongs rot and fall off.

  4. Renee Miller says:

    *giggle* You said "dingdongs."

  5. Renee Miller says:

    Thank you, Adam. My skills with a real pencil are about as pathetic. 🙂

  6. Rita Webb says:

    Is that a butter knife? Because it's dull, it should hurt more.How come I'm suddenly getting email about all your old posts?

  7. Renee Miller says:

    I don't know, Rita. That's really odd. And the update for your comment was sent to my gmail account. Normally they go to my regular email.

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I like to write stuff. Sometimes it's funny. I've published some novels and short fiction. I also battle an addiction to cake and potato chips, and I sometimes have inappropriate fantasies involving Kevin Spacey.

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